I wearily roll over in my bed cramped with random pillows, blankets, and tissues to glance at the clock on my table which reads 1:15 am. It’s the first night I’ve been feeling the effects of COVID-19 and time feels endless, as if to mock my suffering even more.
I have coasted through the last two years feeling superior for not having virus scares since I was vaccinated and would properly wear my mask, but I met my demise when the omicron variant began to familiarize itself with the world. I left school early on Friday morning and quarantined myself in my room to await diagnosis.
I could deal with the body aches and chills, but I was at my last straw when my throat began to hurt. I couldn’t swallow or talk without feeling immense pain and I’d spend these times reminiscing on better days when my throat was normal. There was nothing I could do about it except wait it out, and that’s when the torture began.
I started my journey off by listening to my Spotify playlists and staring at the walls for hours. There wasn’t anything to think about other than feeling sorry about my situation, but that was even to keep me occupied until the afternoon. After dozing off and on and having a couple of bites of food my mother was kind enough to bring me, I began my 1990’s to 2000’s rom-com marathon that lasted well into the night. I worked my way through Four Weddings and a Funeral, Mean Girls, The Duff, and The Fault in Our Stars on my computer before I called in a night and fell into a light sleep.
Saturday morning, I was awoken by my mother bringing my breakfast and Tylenol and I was ready to do it all over again. I was feeling a little productive, so I edited some old pictures and began a book for English, but that was short-lived. I took long naps, scrolled mindlessly through Instagram and Tik-Tok, and still missed the days where my throat didn’t cause me immense pain.
Moments begin to get tedious when you only have your thoughts for company, so I tried to keep myself busy with multiple forms of media but it always feels like you end up right where you started mentally. It’s so easy to lose touch with yourself, especially in these trying times, but it’s important to remember what’s waiting for you at the end of the road. You have to persevere and not succumb to intrusive feelings – you will continue to live.
I’m going, to be honest, times are extremely hard right now and I keep jumping to the worst possible outcome for scenarios I think of, but better days are ahead. For me, it’s the prospect of college and working for newspapers – I can only dream of all the people I’ll meet and the stories I’ll be able to share.
Keep your head up and watch another movie. Check out that new band. Write some stories. Just remember that you are in charge of what you choose to do today.